Hello. Did you miss me? Yep that was nearly a whole week without a blog/holiday. Well, we are back off again. This morning we started our second holiday which is 2 weeks in Spain with Karen, my sister Nikki, mum and dad and our friends Rachel and Tibu (you can cross reference all these people with the other blogs; Spain 2013, Spain 2016 and Barcelona will give you pretty much all you need to know about them).

We were flying from Manchester on the 6:10 flight. Yeah I know, that’s early. In fact it was so early that we had to had to set the alarm’s time with a 2 at the front of it. I have a simple rule for getting up; anything after 6:00 is morning; anything before 6:00 is night; Anything before 3:00 is technically still the night before. The alarm went off at 2:50, having just got to sleep at 2:30. We then made sure we turned the alarm off properly. We have returned home on occasions to find the radio blaring as I had forgotten to turn the alarm off. If we did it again the students next door would have been woken up at 2:50 every day for the next fortnight by Radio 4 Extra. (I’ve just checked the schedule, it’s Wolfblood. Very classical.) Come to think of it, the students next door wouldn’t even be in at 3:00 so I don’t know what I was worrying about. 

We got up, checked the back door, loaded the car, re-checked the back door, locked the front door, opened the front door, went in, rechecked the back door, locked the front door and drove around to mum and dad’s where the taxi was picking us up at 3:15. It was so early, the radio station was still playing love songs from the night before. As we pulled into mum and dad’s, there was a gang of students walking home from the night before, screaming. This is a common occurrence. They often wake up mum and dad with their screaming. And they have double glazing. That’s mum and dad who have double glazing, not the students, although that might make them more quiet. (Note to self; when I get home look into patenting a double glazed balaclava which a student could wear so they could still be seen and not heard.)  

A few minutes later, Nikki arrived wheeling her case, and a minute or so later Rachel and Tibu arrived in the Taxi (as passengers. They weren’t moonlighting as cabbies). I say Taxi, for the 7 of us we needed a mini van. They sent us a 16 seater mini bus. On the side it was billed as being “ideal for a night out” so I suppose it was still being operated within its advertised hours. We boarded with our cases, 7 of them plus hand luggage (that is important as you will find out tomorrow).  

“It’s not really built for luggage this bus” said the driver. 

Nope, it’s designed for Hen parties and judging by the smell he had come straight from one. I was slightly perturbed by the fact that the driver seemed to be using his Sat Nav to find the airport. We only have 2 major airports in the North West, Liverpool and Manchester. It’s either left or right on the M58 mate. After that, just follow the signs. He did, and about 40 minutes later we were at the airport. Unfortunately we couldn’t go up the ramp to the departures lounge as he had an extra high mini bus (presumably to accommodate all the hens’ stetsons) so we got dropped on the ground floor and we made our way to Departures to check in. 

We were flying with EasyJet and at Manchester they seem to have this new self check-in system, which like the the self checkout at Tesco, still requires a person to walk around to make sure you are ok. So effectively there are still 4 staff checking you in, but less efficiently. Progress eh? We went to security, and someone asked me if we had Speedy Boarding. We did, and so for the first time ever we fast tracked through security. I say we. Me, Karen, dad, Nikki and Tibu all sailed through. Mum and Rachel had other ideas.  

I have already told you about the problems mum has with security due to her bionic knees; well this time she had an amigo in Rachel who seemed to set alarm bells ringing (literally). She was scanned, frisked and swabbed. However during the frisking the security lady did comment on how nice and soft her top was and how nice her shoes were. Perhaps this is the new caring face of airport security.:

“Ooh, you have a lovely case” as the sniffer dogs rip it apart. 

“Well your prostate is in good condition” after conducting a cavity search. 

Tibu was so amused by this (as any supportive husband would be) that he took a photo. I had noticed the don’t take photos signs but I don’t think he had. Within seconds he was asked to delete it, which he duly did. (Note to security guards; iPhones have a deleted items folder where the picture goes to. You need to get them to delete that one too.) 

It was 4:20…in the morning…and we were checked in and through security. A great start to the holiday…so we thought… 

Tomorrow: the flight from hell, missing bags and the perils of Spanish bank holidays.